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Why Choose stoogepie Bank?

stoogepie Bank can help you in ways that no traditional bank can.

First, stoogepie Bank was started to take advantage of the historic banking bailout. You send stoogepie your money and he will lose it in bad investments, which stoogepie is very good at doing. Then, when stoogepie Bank gets its bailout money, you get your share. In the meantime, you get to borrow money from stoogepie Bank like there's no tomorrow, just like you've done the past few years from traditional banks that don't give a shit about you.

Second, to pay off your debt while we all wait for the bailout, stoogepie Bank accepts all sorts of non-traditional in-kind payments, including blowjobs, rimjobs, buttfucks, watersports, and S&M. The list is only limited by your imagination. Need a credit card? Get a high-limit no-fee card for only a few sexual acts you would probably do for stoogepie anyway after dinner and a few drinks.

So give stoogepie Bank a try and see what dozens of other consumers have already discovered: it's good to know your banker. In the biblical sense.